Tomorrow is Go-Day: Random Pre-Surgery Thoughts (Because Why Not)

Well, folks, tomorrow is the big day. Yep, Go-Day. Surgery. And you’d think I’d be laser-focused on all things medical, but no. Instead, my brain has decided to become a full-blown carnival of random thoughts, each one more ridiculous than the last. I imagine it’s a bit like how animals or random people must feel before their own “big days…”

The Penguin’s Pre-Dive Pep Talk:

“Alright, Gerald, you’ve trained for this. One belly flop into the ocean and you’re going to wow the whole colony. Don’t let your feet get in the way…again. And for the love of all things fishy, KEEP YOUR WINGS TUCKED. You don’t want another slow-motion video of you splashing around like a beached whale. Not today.”

The Chicken’s Final Moment Before Cross-Road Decision:

“Is it really greener on the other side, or is this just one of those metaphorical life lessons? Do I risk it? Why did the duck cross the road? Is this a fowl conspiracy? Bawk… decisions, decisions.”

The Gym Trainer’s Midnight Thought Before a Monday:

“Okay, tomorrow’s the day. They’ll all be back, fresh off a weekend of ‘I’ll start again on Monday’ and with added truncal obesity.’ Little do they know that Monday is leg day. Oh, the sweet sound of groaning as they realize what they’ve signed up for. Gotta remember to smile… even when they cry.”

My Dog’s Thought Every Time I Leave the House:

“She’s leaving me…forever. Probably moving us to a llama farm…again. I can’t believe this betrayal. I’ll just sit here, alone, staring out the window dramatically like a sad 90s music video character. I don’t need her… Wait, she’s back already?! Best day ever!”

And here I am, thinking:

Me, 24 Hours Pre-Surgery:

“I wonder if they’ll let me pick the music in the operating room? Should I wear my lucky socks, or will they make me take them off? Can I bring Junior Mints for the medical team? What if I wake up mid-surgery and start reciting random trivia facts? What if my surgeon is dressed as a penguin?!”

Your support and kind words have meant the world to me. I’ve got a jar full of your well-wishes, and I plan to sprinkle them liberally, like glitter, all over the operating room (just to remind everyone who’s in charge). So, thank you for being my tribe, my laugh squad, and my virtual support crew. I’ll be back soon enough with more shenanigans and probably some great material from my hospital adventures.

Until then, I’ll leave you with this: life’s a lot like surgery. You prep, you freak out a little (okay, maybe a lot), and then you trust. And if all else fails, you just close your eyes and let the anesthesia do its magic.

Catch you on the flip side—with fewer random thoughts and a lot more gratitude!

With love, laughter, and absolutely no penguins in the OR,

C: